I was confronted with yet another iteration of the NPDCINST 5401 this morning--yet another DRAFT copy of it, that is. Everytime I think of it, I am reminded of the quote from the Federalist Papers, Federalist #62, "The internal effects of a mutable policy are still more calamitous. It poisons the blessings of libert itself. It will be of little avail to the people, that the laws are made by men of their own choice, if the laws be so voluminous that they cannot be read, or so incoherent that they cannot be understood; if they be repealed or revised before they are promulgated, or undergo such incessant changes that no man, who knows what the law is today, can guess what it will be tomorrow." I'm sure someone will take offense to that, but I'm also sure that some of my predecessors will feel lifted up by it.

I stepped outside this morning to take Chloe out to go to the bathroom. I hate to say that she was very annoying this morning. However, stepping outside was wonderful this morning! The air was crisp and clear, the sky was blue, the temperature was perfect, not hot, not cold. I stood there for a few moments staring up into the sky, luxuriating in just being. Once I realized what I was doing, I was immediately struck by the Zen-ness of what I was doing. That lead me back down the path of what is the best religious experience. I felt that same Zen-ness on my way into work this morning. For some reason I didn't feel rushed or in a hurry. Instead, I was just driving to work. I noticed the sun, the water under the bridge was mostly placid with streaks of sunlight flashing from it's mirrored surface. I noticed the trees that lined the road on the way to work, noticed the potholes in the street (well, actually saw and avoided them as opposed to running into them and cursing as my car bounced around the road). It leads me back to my belief that stress is driven by our inability to slow down and focus on things around us. I believe in Zen it is called single-purposedeness (sp?), Gordon Bok called it monotasking. That's something that it would be nice to get back to. Instead, we are in a world of multitasking. We don't have time to do anything except work--and being the most productive society on the face of the planet, we have no choice but to work. I'm not saying that technological advancement and innovation aren't important, I'm saying more that we are a relatively immature society. We focus too much on the material pleasures of life, and forget about the transcendent, those things that make up the far more liberating and euphoric of our human experiences. The societies in Europe seem to be more mature than we are in that respect. They seem to lean more towards taking time off, getting in touch with themselves and their families, and even with the environment around them. That feeds their psyche and their energy and propels them into experiences that we as Americans could only hope to attain. I believe that as we mature as a society we will eventually reach that point, but it is a point we should have already reached. It means that we will slip down the hegemonic ladder, but is that the most important thing in the world? I don't believe so. I think that as humans we are so accustomed to joining into groups of people that are likeminded, and as we get involved and absorbed into that group, we begin to resent and then to hate other people who aren't like us. That is the problem, we should be worried about PEOPLE, not about those like us, but ALL of them. We are all together on this planet, going through the same crises and ups and downs, however we always see the world as "us and them" no matter who the "us" or "them" is. That's the problem, and that's what leads to strife in the world. Until we recognize that we are all together on this planet, and get past the class/racial/sexual/etc differences, we are going to be immature--and if we're not careful, we're going to destroy ourselves.

I'm in the office alone today, everyone else has gone somewhere else. Kim is home sick, Heather took Hannah to the Doctor, and Hank is getting his window fixed that got busted out. So that leaves me here by myself. I'm working on my reading for NSDM tonight, actually watching a CD video while typing this entry. Other than that, not much is going on. I'm tempted to jet a little early today, but I can't because of my class. I guess I could wander out and do something other than work, but I'm sure there is something that I could be doing. Whether or not it is something that I want to be doing remains to be seen.

I talked to Chaplain Johnson yesterday, mostly just to get some problems off of my chest. I don't know if I was looking for answers, or for guidance so much as I was looking to get the problems off of my chest so that I could liberate myself from them. I didn't succeed in the liberating part completely, the thoughts and feelings are still there. But to be able to express them to someone certainly made a difference.

I'll have to end this now, have other things I should be doing.